1/2

as much as i "do" to reinforce it
i am still fighting it
as i have fought it
on and off for a year

and i still can't believe that i have to "do" this:
shut off a part of myself
not closing down was such a huge positive part of it all
and it took so much not to give in to it
and that seemed like such growth

but i see no other way now,
i see no other way to go forward