i am crying...

why?

i cried all day today

i haven't seen this painting in years
and i want to
i want to have it hanging in my house

i had been thinking of logging in here for a while
it's hard for me to let this go
it represents so much of my life
so much desire
so much love
so much beauty
and so much pain

it's just huge

oh well

it's in my bedroom now
i see it every day
sometimes it is just in the background
other times
i feel a tug
time has a way of changing things