3/1

so i was thinking...
in the studio tonite...
maybe there is a reason for things

actually
i am such a "thinking" type
despite my trying to paint from a "feeling" side
(this is the jungian in me talking)
that as long as i have a "reason" for something
(tho it must be a reason with resonance)
i am ok with it

so i guess i need to find a "reason"
for why i allowed myself to get into a position where i was without a studio for so long....
so if i come up with one,
one that i can believe
i can start to erase this doubt that has plagued me

so tonite
in the studio
i was thinking
maybe it was to make sure that i could be in a different place
be free to paint from a different place

and now...
something that not even i will understand when i reread this in a year
"not so much from a different place
but for a higher version of it"
where validating the work
becomes more inspiring
than validating myself