8/14

yes i love working in the garden
but it cost me so much
i fell so behind in all the things i am supposed to be doing that i had an awful, stressful, long (still not over) day
and it's going to have financial repercussions as well
i just don't understand what the answer is
how to make it all work

and i am too worn out to even manage the stress
all i want to do is collapse
and i am going away to the beach
and that should be good
but again it's not
i don't like to go away when i am like this
when i am like this
i need to be in my space
(and i certainly don't want to pack)
as tenuous and unfamiliar as that space might be...